Stuff & Nonsense: essays


Showing posts with label essays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label essays. Show all posts

02 March 2013

It's in the Bag and Under the Covers: Stories of Dating, Intimacy, Sex, & Caregiving About People with Ostomies



So you poop in a bag and you want to know if what you feel about that is "normal?" You're either going to end up on the Internet or at your public library, looking for information about what it means to be an ostomate. Not the nitty-gritty medical stuff -- doctors cover that pretty well -- but the messy emotional stuff about relationships and intimacy your doctor might have given you a not-really-helpful brochure about. (Mine had a middle-aged couple walking hand-in-hand on a beach. I was nineteen. It did not make me feel better about my new self).

Should you end up at your library, ask your nice reference librarian to interlibrary loan this book for you. Should you end up on Amazon, go ahead and buy it ... then donate it to your library when you're done with it.

Truly, I found It's in the Bag and Under the Covers to be a very helpful, informative, and encouraging book. The book is a compilation of true stories contributed by members of MeetAnOstoMate.com so you're guaranteed a healthy dose of real people talking about what it is really like to live with an ostomy. Some stories are funny, some are sad, and some had my nodding along saying "that! that is exactly how it happened for me, too!"

(Basically, we are all beautiful, sexy creatures and people who really like us and want to make beautiful sexytimes with us won't care about how we go to the bathroom).

It's in the Bag and Under the Covers: Stories of Dating, Intimacy, Sex, & Caregiving About People with Ostomies by Brenda Elsagher (Expert Publishing, 2011)

13 September 2010

Behind the Bedroom Door: Getting It, Giving It, Loving It, Missing It


An emotionally diverse collection of personal essays about women and sex by twenty-six talented writers like Julie Powell, Susan Shapiro, and Ali Liebegott. While some essays are a bit explicit, they ultimately tend more toward candid insight than eroticism. My favorite essays were Deanna Kizis's assertive "Turning the Other Cheek," Valerie Frankel's funny "Ouch, You're Lying on My Hair!," and Hope Edelman's tender "The Sweetest Sex I Never Had." I was so moved by Edelman's essay about falling in love at fifteen while her mother died from cancer that I read it three times.

I imagine -- in the way it's convenient for teachers to reduce students to stereotypes -- that she saw me as the honor student tossing my smarts in the trash for the chance to screw a former outlaw. But she didn't know him, not really, not as the sweet, gentle boy I knew him to be, the one who touched me so carefully, so perfectly, that I needed his hands on me all the time.
(from Edelman's "The Sweetest Sex I Never Had")

Excerpts from selected essays are available on the book's website, behindthebedroomdoor.com.

Behind the Bedroom Door: Getting It, Giving It, Loving It, Missing It edited by Paula Derrow (Delacorte Press, 2008)